Today's post is inspired by this talk:
I'm feeling particularly tired and sad today. And frustrated. This parenting thing, it seems like you can never win, can you? After a day of feeling proud of myself and seeing fruits of my hard work and decisions, today I felt it all crumbling around me when self-doubt crept in and made me hate this entire world and all this judgment and this loneliness I'm feeling of not knowing who to talk to and who to trust...And also of making decisions based on what I think, which is often times confusing and not that sure, especially when everyone around me seems to question it.
Frick. For example, for such a STUPID example - to pierce or not to pierce her little ears? How can THIS be creating such an annoying problem within the family?
How and what she eats. How and if she breastfeeds. How and when she cries/tantrums. Whether or not she's wearing cologne. (oh my goood!!) How I dress her. What I offer her to play. In what language I speak to her. What school she doesn't even attend yet.
Everything. so. subject. to. such. scrutiny. it. makes. me. dizzy. I'm used to more privacy, to less intense family meddling and sharing. I. am. tired.
Feel like cutting off all my hair and moving to Japan.