It's raining, I'm sitting at a café and I like the feeling. This little cocoon feeling I get when I'm writing and I put the world on hold. Actually, better stated, I put myself on hold, in parenthesis.
I never enjoy going to the psychiatrist. It's almost not better than the gynecologist. Or the dentist. I guess I don't like any kind of doctor...but the psychiatrist can be just plain darn humiliating. I always feel so little when I go into that office and the man in the white coat gives me lessons on my pointless anxiety (as if I didn't know that, as if all I needed was to "snap" out of it and "REALIZE", oh my god, I don't really have a reason to be so anxious! Thanks a lot, the obvious is lovely.
But, alas, I need the prescription and he holds them in his white coat power. I try to hold my breath and make it as painless as possible, without losing the whole point of going.
So here I am, in a café, its raining outside and I have an hour to myself before my next class. A cappuccino is a must. I love having to wear a sweater or jacket and the biological need to warm myself up. So comforting!
I seriously think I want to try being a vegetarian again. Well, try "again" is a bit of a stretch, I tried for a week last time. But still...maybe all I have to do is imagine the little animal alive and hopping about and that will be enough to remind me. I know I'll need a backup plan for the severe cravings...maybe I should with only the red meat ban and work from there.
This is the first time I write at a café...it's such a tradition, isn't it? People with books and laptops? Even though I'm the only one here, it seems....Brazil hasn't really developed this much yet.
Rain, coat, cappuccino and overall overwhelming sleepy narcotic feeling!
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