I wish I could write it with pen and paper in hand, but time is not something I have to spare.
I am captive to this love, 24/7. My milk is our compass for now.
Her skin is so soft, silky and brand new. I soak its smell up, intoxicated. I am exhausted, yet discovering new realms of energy and motivation. and FAITH, lots of it.
My day is full of should's, but she's the only need to.
Who is this little girl in my lap? Who is this baby, who will very soon not be a baby anymore? Her father's eyes? Her mother's nose? Who will she prove to be, little by little, smile by smile?
She is eager - eager to talk, eager to move, eager to be touch and be touched. She is grateful and generous, smiling and cooing when we get it right. She is learning to experiment things with her mouth, right now it's her little hand. Her plump little drool covered hand. What is your world like, little one? Do you feel safe, loved, happy? That's all I could hope for.
Having a child is so unfathomably bewildering.